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The 2007 ASLaN Society
Christmas Essay      
No Ho Ho


Just Say NO to the Ho Ho Ho!

Now that Black Friday cash registers have rung in “Ad-vent”, the international Santa juggernaut has shifted into high gear. This deafening monstrosity has a Wizard-of-OZ-sized problem, however.

MTV and media moguls might not advertise the news, but citizens in many lands are silently – or not-so-silently – throwing a wrench into the out-of-control Santa Machine.

Whether we be Christians, agnostics or Jews, or social activists, European traditionalists, or people just longing for simplicity and authenticity, we are fed up with the ubiquitous beast from the north. And we are fighting back one family and community at a time to renew older traditions, or just to regain some sanity.

Some of us love the original St. Nicholas while others think the whole Christmas story is an outworn myth too. Whatever the case, we all agree that Santa is no longer welcome at our holiday party and we’ve finally found the courage to “Just so NO to the Ho Ho Ho”.

Since it’s that time again when many resist both reason and Revelation to become addicted to the Santa drug, the International ASLaN Society offers these good reasons to resist the pressures of Santamania.

Resist the guilt of the Santa Trap. Not all expectations are great, especially when they come with so many strings attached! A visitor from Mars to America’s malls might think that shoppers resemble marionettes attached to the strings of manufactured “needs”.

Don’t let guilt-induced stress affect the great blessing of giving. Simple can be good; it may even be better.

Resist the Santa Cult. Sociologists have pointed out that this incessant Santamization of December has profoundly religious elements. Consider these: iconic images of the Great Santa appear nearly everywhere, children bow on bended knee before him, worshippers praise him round evergreen trees in town squares, and filmmakers make hagiographic films to bring him honor.

All the while many religious leaders dare not speak ill of him, fearing his wrath.

Smash the remote and take back control of your Christmas. Whether we sanctify it as holy, or just enjoy it for what it once was, a wonderful winter solstice excuse to eat, drink, and be merry— it’s time to knock the Claus from his counterfeit throne.

Resist the Beijing Branch of Madison Avenue. Our holidaty extravaganza may have roots in Europe, but these days Made in China is clearly stamped on Santa’s butt. Retailers import a huge percentage of toys, trinkets, and clothes from Chinese factories. They whistle Jingle Bells all the way to Hong Kong banks while China’s Communist rulers continue to act like King Herod.

Beware of the adverts; make or do something yourself for the ones you love. Or buy local when you can.

Resist the temptation of lying so blatantly to children. Three psychologists have more opinions than five rabbis, so don’t believe it when you hear it’s “OK” to pretend some fat red guy from Hollywood actually cares about kids.

Resist the schmaltz! Oivee, if Isaiah could see what American culture has done with his prophecies he’d start Jews Against Santa. Santa Schmanta, who needs Santa? It ain’t his birthday party, or am I missing something?

Resist cultural conformity. You don’t need to be a culture jammer or performance artist to join the resistance. There are many ways to withstand the Christmas insanity that rushes in each year. Seek them and you will find them.

Resist the captivity of St. Nicholas. Most American children know something about Santa, but how many study the real Saint Nicholas? Likewise, how many adults know that Nicholas’ modern-day followers in Turkey are living under the second-class captivity of Koranic Dhimmitude?

It is bizarre, and it borders on the immoral, to seclude our children into some fuzzy Santa cocoon each winter and pretend that crises like world hunger, AIDS orphans, the Islamic Jihad or the genocide in Darfur have taken a holiday from their campaign of despair and destruction.

Santa is not going to save our civilization folks.

Resist the Santa hangover that hits many Americans like a Mack truck when they wake-up from the excesses of what C.S. Lewis called “Exmas.” Sure, a lot of good is done for our kids and our communities under the guise of Santa, but consider how much isn’t done because of that same guise?

Maybe we Santaholics could slow down, abstain from shopping for a moment, and try to distinguish between needs and wants.

Lastly, resist the Santification of the Incarnation! Never mind putting Christ back into Christmas (as though He ever left!) – it’s time to kick Santa out of Christmas! The eternal Word made flesh for our salvation is the most amazing event in history, but a sleepy people have let this feast become prostituted.

Citizens -- be soldiers: join the war on Santa.

His bogus but well-heeled kingdom is teetering under the weight of it’s own absurdities.

Sinter Knicker is the pen name for a poet and teacher from Maine who founded the International Anti-Santa Love-Nicholas Society in 1995 while living in northern China.


Are you annoyed by,
sarcastic about,
or just plain sick and tired
of Santa?

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1st Anti-Claus
Art & Photo Competition
If so, then why don't you...


Bloody Santa NY05
Madonna With Santa
Santa Claws
Original Anti Claus
Crucify Him
SantaAccident


The Deadline is January 7th, 2008

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